Ingabe ngisebudlelwaneni obungaphephile?

Igama lami nginguGugu * ngisanda kugubha usuku lokuzalwa ​​lwami ngihlanganisa iminyaka engamashumi ayisithupha nabangane esikoleni. Isoka lami elineminyaka engu-25 ubudala liyangithanda kakhulu kangangokuthi lingithengela izipho futhi liyangiyisa ezindaweni zokudlela ezibizayo. Kodwa wathukuthela kakhulu ngemuva kwephathi yami ngoba ngangihleli namantombazane nabafana basesikoleni. Uthi 'ngishibhile' futhi wangishaya kanzima kangangokuba umlomo wami wopha. Wadabuka ngemuva kwalokho wathi akazi ukuthi ubengenwe yini futhi wesaba ukuthi uzolahlekelwa yimi. Waxolisa, wangithengela i-airtime kanye ne-jean entsha.
 

Uma 'uthando' lubuhlungu akusilo uthandololo, akhathaliseki ukuthi siyini isizathu esiyimbangela yobuhlungu. Ukukuvimbela ukuba ungachithi isikhathi nabangani, ucelwa ukuba 'ubonise uthando lwakho ngokuya ocansini' nokukhonjiswa ukuthi ukukulinyazwa ngandlela-thile iphutha lakho, izibonakaliso ezicacile ukuthi usebudlelwaneni obubi. Khumbula ukuthi ukubangela ubuhlungu emzimbeni bomunye umuntu ukumlimaza  kodwa ukubizwa ngamagama, ukuthukwa, ukunganakwa umuntu othandana naye nokungafuni ukusebenzisa ikhondomu nakho futhi kuyalimaza !


Uthando lungaboniswa ngezindlela eziningi ezingadingi ucansi noma imali. Ukubambana, ukuqabulana nokuba ndawonye, ukubambana izandla, ukukhuluma ngekusasa kuyizindlela ezimbalwa...

Ubudlwelwane obuphilile bugcwele uthando, umusa nokuhlonipha. Hlonipha othandana naye kanye nawe futhi; ngakho-ke ungamukeli ukulimazwa noma ukuphoqwa ukwenza noma yini ongazimisele ukuyenza. 

Ngakho ucabangani? Ingabe uGugu * usebudlelwaneni obungaphilile?


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B-Wise User Anonymous 11 September 2019 18:48

Hi. Ngiyintombazanyana esencane ngineminyaka engu 22 umuntu engithandana naye he's 25 we've been together for 4 years now , kwakumnandi I relationship yethu isaqala kwahamba iskhashana he cheated and I decided to fogive him nova I thought he will change kuthe ngonyaka odlule waqala mange wangishaya mangimfakashele ngazama ukuhlukana Gaye Kodak ngabon ukut ngisamthanda ngaxola kuthe kusenjalo ngaqala ngagula ngiphathwa isinye discharge yam seyinuka ngigula .... kuye kwaya I discovered that usekhulelisile wabanengane kodwa ngithando enginalo ngaphinda ngaxola ngoba wathembisa ukuthi ukwenzekile kwakuliphutha Sihambe isikhathi ngikhuluma nje kumanje akusekho mnandi sihlezi ngokulwa sengisaba nokumvakashela nova uyangishaya angilimaze ken wangishaya ngavalekaa I so wangishaya indlebe yami kumanje ayizwa kahle cela usizo ngiphuma kanjani la abgisaluboni uthando kodwa uyangilandela okubgiphatha kabi akasangifoneli I'm the one omfonelayo , mangimtshela ngezinto azenzayo ezingiphatha kabi ulwanami athi phela I busy kepha mangithi kungcono sehlukane akafuni okungihkukumeza more after ethics umnntwana wathi uzoshibtsha kepha usaqhubeka uyajola mangimbamba u blame mina Kwenziwa njani makunje???

B-Wise Expert Expert 22 September 2019 18:43

Sawubona, usundlule kokuningi kulobudlelwane bakho. Kona kunzima ukuhlukana nomuntu othandana naye kodwa uma ekuhlukumeza emoyeni akusiyo into enhle. Ziningi izinyathelo ongazithatha ukuze uthole usizo, ungaya emaphoyisemi ucele bakuvikele ngokukunikeza I phepha elimuphocela ukuthi angasondel duze nawe. Ungashinsha inombolo yakho yocingo ukuze angakutholi mekufonela noma ungayohlala nabantu obathembayo abazokweseka . Kuko konkhe okwenzano, uciniseke ukuthi uhlale uphephile njalo. Ongathola nosizo ngokufonela 0800 428 428, noma *120* 7867# or thumela umlayezo (SMS) othi “help” ku 31531.



B-Wise User Dintle 11 September 2019 13:25

My dear it's too obvious that your relationship is unhealthy.If you want to leave just leave,he has no say in your decision making over him

B-Wise Expert Expert 12 September 2019 11:03

Gugu can learn about dealing with a breakup here https://bwisehealth.com/article/how-to-deal-with-a-breakup



B-Wise User Anonymous 9 September 2019 19:30

Hi I HV been in a relationship for any 4years I recently found out the guy is dating other 15 gals n am preg I tried to talk to him abt his behaviors bt he doesn't change infact he just continue living his life like nothing is wrong

B-Wise Expert Expert 17 September 2019 10:57

Hi there, thank you for your question. That must be a really difficult situation for you. You can try couples couselling if your partner is willing to do that. 



B-Wise User Mmatsatsi1960 9 September 2019 18:54

Gugu is in an abusive relationship. She must leave the guy, because he'll repeat the very same thing or even worse.

B-Wise User Anonymous 31 August 2019 18:56

Hi Gugu thanks for your question. My dear you are not in a healthy relationship, because that guy cannot allow you to spend time with your school mates. If he really loves he mustn't hit you and buy gifts to apologise,infact i believe he is using you. Because you love him try to talk to him. Explain that you not happy with his behaviour, if nothing changes you can even leave him always remember you are a CEO of your life. However, try to focus on your studies and make the best person you wish to be.

B-Wise User Anonymous 25 August 2019 14:54

Hi, I'm Patienc, still schooling in grade 11 and I'm 16 years old, I'm dating a 24 years old man I truly love him and he truly love me but I have some douts him based on the conversation with him and other girls but he always tells me how truly he loves me and we always talks about our future, he always tell me to finish school and after schooling he wants 2 kids and he wants to build future with me so I think I'm in healthy relationship So what do you think of me guys?

B-Wise Expert Expert 26 August 2019 11:07

Hi thank you for your question. NEVER put yourself down. Keep trying to finish school. If you have doubts about your partner you should talk to him about it, remember trust is a big part of a relationship.



B-Wise User Anonymous 21 August 2019 10:52

There was a guy "he passed away weeks ago" he deeply wanted to be in a relationship with me and I never gave him a chance he tried so I didn't care,he passed away few weeks back and now I can't sleep nor sleep I think of him every second I now love him deep I even fantasy my life with him even on my dreams..I think I'm getting mad now,I live things hanging and sit down and imagine me and him what could've happen and become happy after..I'm talking alone as if I'm with him..how do I let him go without doing even more stupid things

B-Wise Expert Expert 22 August 2019 18:12

Hi, so sorry to hear that things have happened this way. Whether you loved him before or not, it sounds like a part of you did care for him, and that you really miss him. Sometimes we only realise how we feel about someone when they’re gone. And maybe this is a way of realising what you really want in a relationship.

There’s no right or wrong way to deal with grief, and sometimes grief makes us feel strange or do strange things. It’s only a few weeks since this guy passed away, so give yourself some time to make sense of it. It’s OK to be sad and think about him.

If you find this issue is stopping your from living your life, getting in the way of your work or studies, or affecting your other relationships, it’s a good idea to speak to someone about your feelings. A trusted adult, a counsellor or psychologist can help.

 



B-Wise User Anonymous 9 August 2019 13:59

Gugu is in an unhealthy relationship because her boyfriend may be sorry yes but he have already shown signs of abuse .

B-Wise Expert Expert 11 August 2019 12:13

Yes that is true 



B-Wise User Matomane 5 August 2019 16:40

Gugu must leave that boyfriend and move on with her life ð???ð???

B-Wise User Anonymous 4 August 2019 21:13

Gugu is in unhealthy relationship

B-Wise User Luvo 3 August 2019 11:37

Gugu is definitely in an unhealthy relationship,she should consider getting some distance away from him and getting a protection order from the police.

B-Wise User Anonymous 1 August 2019 22:27

yes

B-Wise Expert Expert 5 August 2019 09:16

Thank you for the feedback



B-Wise User Anonymous 21 April 2019 08:38

She is in an unhealthy relationship

B-Wise User Slender-Baep 17 April 2019 14:29

No she's not in a healthy relationship.

B-Wise User MissDingila 17 April 2019 11:34

Yess Gugu is in an unhealthy relationship

B-Wise User Nanah 12 April 2019 15:40

Gugu must leave that boyfriend because he beat her just because she was celebrating birthday with her friends. Don't be bribe my gift airtime think about your life. One he will kill you

B-Wise User Anonymous 26 December 2018 14:42

Oooh indeed

B-Wise User Anonymous 21 12 December 2018 22:21

Unhealthy relationship....