There is so much pressure at this age!

Many adults think that adolescents don’t have stress but that is not true! Nowadays adolescents are even more stressed than adults. There is so much going on.

You could be stressing about any of these things:

• Am I going to do well at school?

• Am I going to fail?

• What will my friends think?

• How I look (your size or body shape)?

• What do I wear (types of clothing, jewellery, or hairstyles)

• Will I cope with puberty?

• What about sex?

• Do they love me?

• Boyfriends

• Girlfriends

• Teenage pregnancy

• My future job or career

• My family is always fighting

• I had an argument with my friends

• Bullies

• Violence

• Social media  

• Drugs and alcohol

• What do others expect of me?


Stress is your body’s natural reaction to a challenge, which could be anything from obvious physical danger to asking someone on a date or writing a test.

Stress is not always bad

Good and bad things create stress. Getting into a fight with a friend is stressful, but so is a passionate kiss or falling in love! Positive stress helps you to react quickly, perform well and to “rise to a challenge”. However bad or ongoing stressful situations can wear you out, weaken your immune system, and make you feel depleted. It can also lead to mental health problems. Stress is the uncomfortable feeling of being overwhelmed.

Spot the signs that you are stressed!

  • Having more headaches, tummy aches, body pains or tiredness
  • Shutting down and no longer wanting to be around people or do activities
  • Being anger or irritable all the time
  • Crying more often
  • Feeling you can't do anything right
  • Being worried, anxious and nervous all the time
  • Not being able to sleep at night
  • Being too busy to eat or not feeling hungry
  • Not being able to focus

If you are stressed, it is important that you speak to someone like your parents / caregiver / a trusted adult / healthcare worker or friend to help you cope.

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B-Wise User Anonymous 8 July 2020 15:59

Ingabe umuntu oneminyaka ewu14 usuke esengenile kwi idolesent?

B-Wise Expert Expert 8 July 2020 17:31

Hello,

Yes a 14 year old is an adolescent



B-Wise User Angiebotha@gemail.com 3 July 2020 21:48

Hi how do I fixes my relationship

B-Wise Expert Expert 4 July 2020 17:14

Hello,

Use the contact information below to talk to a counselor who can give you advice:

Get in touch with LoveLife's Contact Centre on 0800 121 900 or send a PLZ CAL ME to 083 323 1023 

You can also whatsapp Life Line at 065 989 9238

 



B-Wise User Liyabona 28 June 2020 18:09

Boys always teas me when I reject them what should I do

B-Wise Expert Expert 29 June 2020 15:38

Hello,

You should believe in yourself and be confident even if they tease you. No one can force you to be in a relationship with them.

Use the contact information below to talk to a counselor who can give you advice:

Get in touch with LoveLife's Contact Centre on 0800 121 900 or send a PLZ CAL ME to 083 323 1023 

You can also whatsapp Life Line at 065 989 9238



B-Wise User Babykay 26 June 2020 19:47

Hi doc....I have low self esteem on my self cause I hv two tone on my face so I always hide it bcuz no boy will want to date a girl with 2 tone What should I doð???

B-Wise Expert Expert 28 June 2020 16:15

Hello,

Use the contact information below to talk to a counselor who can give you advice:

Get in touch with LoveLife's Contact Centre on 0800 121 900 or send a PLZ CAL ME to 083 323 1023 

You can also whatsapp Life Line at 065 989 9238



B-Wise User Anonymous 20 June 2020 12:31

What to do when you hear things that doesnt exist?

B-Wise Expert Expert 22 June 2020 14:42

Hello,

Please use the contact information below to talk to a counselor who can give you advice:

Get in touch with LoveLife's Contact Centre on 0800 121 900 or send a PLZ CAL ME to 083 323 1023 

You can also whatsapp Life Line at 065 989 9238



B-Wise User Maboke mootane 19 June 2020 20:18

What must I do to have have strong and better performance during sex with my wife Couse I all ways fail her with one round that takes 2minutes help pls

B-Wise Expert Expert 22 June 2020 10:23

Hi there,

Read this: https://bwisehealth.com/article/sexual-and-reproductive-health-tips-for-men



B-Wise User Anonymous 18 June 2020 13:59

Hi.nginengcindezi ngihlala nomzali inkinga angisiqedanga isikole angisebenzi sengizame ngapha nangapha lutho omsebenzi ngina40 kumanje. so angisazi ngenzenjani nginomtwana oyedwa. akukho mhlampe inumber ngangicebisa ngiyifonele thina eisfuna umsebenzi ekunzima ngiyabonga

B-Wise Expert Expert 18 June 2020 21:22

Hi,

Use the contact information below to talk to a counselor who can give you advice:

Get in touch with LoveLife's Contact Centre on 0800 121 900 or send a PLZ CAL ME to 083 323 1023 

You can also whatsapp Life Line at 065 989 9238

 

 



B-Wise User The gal next door 11 June 2020 23:59

Boys at my school like my boody why am I always angry sad and feel like cry

B-Wise Expert Expert 12 June 2020 11:26

Hello,

Use the contact information below to talk to a counselor who can give you advice:

Get in touch with LoveLife's Contact Centre on 0800 121 900 or send a PLZ CAL ME to 083 323 1023 

You can also whatsapp Life Line at 065 989 9238

 

 



B-Wise User The gal next door 11 June 2020 23:51

Hi I am 12 years old and can i have sex with my boyfriend

B-Wise Expert Expert 12 June 2020 11:25

Hello,

Please read this: https://bwisehealth.com/article/sex-on-the-mind-are-you-ready



B-Wise User Anonymous 20 May 2020 20:48

I do have all the signs indicated as someone being stressed. Being positive to all points definitely means I'm stressed? I've been so confused lately but even speaking up about is hard for me.

B-Wise Expert Expert 21 May 2020 15:51

Hi,

Use the contact information below to talk to a counselor who can give you advice:

Get in touch with LoveLife's Contact Centre on 0800 121 900 or send a PLZ CAL ME to 083 323 1023 

You can also whatsapp Life Line at 065 989 9238



B-Wise User Anonymous 20 May 2020 20:26

Hi my daughter is turning 14this year she have a problem at school she is struggling with reading sometimes I help her with her school work but she end up crying what can I do to help her and make her feel confident in her self and school work

B-Wise Expert Expert 21 May 2020 15:51

Hello,

Use the contact information below to talk to a counselor who can give you advice:

Get in touch with LoveLife's Contact Centre on 0800 121 900 or send a PLZ CAL ME to 083 323 1023 

You can also whatsapp Life Line at 065 989 9238



B-Wise User Anonymous 19 May 2020 16:07

Hey. I'm 13 and I always compare myself to other people. I'm thick so in most cases I only eat twice a day or even once some days. I am really into dancing but I feel like I won't be good enough to be a professional dancer if I'm fat. It feels like my body weight is blocking or delaying my goals and dreams.

B-Wise Expert Expert 19 May 2020 16:13

Hi there,

Use the contact information below to talk to a counselor who can give you advice:

Get in touch with LoveLife's Contact Centre on 0800 121 900 or send a PLZ CAL ME to 083 323 1023 

You can also whatsapp Life Line at 065 989 9238



B-Wise User Hdannids 10 May 2020 14:32

Hii I am 13 years I'm not really stressed out about puberty coz I don't have my periods yet I'm stressed about my first kiss I never had my first kiss I like this boy and I wanna kiss him for my first but I don't know if he likes me he's 15 years I don't know if I'm pushing myself do kiss someone But I really want my first kiss I don't know if I should wait please help give me advice please

B-Wise Expert Expert 10 May 2020 14:53

Hello,

You need to be sure that you want to have the kiss first. You then need to talk to the boy to make sure he also wants to have the kiss.



B-Wise User Anonymous 19 April 2020 21:47

Hey Buttercup I am stressed because I have a friend who really likes me and I like him too -But the problem is his family is not financially stable to match my standard And his friend of his likes me too and says when you are rich you should date people who are rich and I might not have a future with a poor guy My parents say I should just follow my heart I think to follow my heart but keeps me thinking of what he said Please help

B-Wise Expert Expert 20 April 2020 12:13

Hello,

You should listen to your parents and what they say because they know best. Friends can give you advice that is wrong.



B-Wise User Anonymous 19 April 2020 16:19

Hi i live by my mother's house all her children is living there and their father and both my "sisters" have babies and one sister's boyfriend also lives there and me and my boyfriend and our boy is also living there but the problem is i don't feel happy there because everytime all of them is on my case and that is stressfull coz i feel sad everyday when i get home ..they making me feel unwelcome even my own mother does that....i just need some advise on how to deal with something like this i cry almost every night

B-Wise Expert Expert 20 April 2020 11:55

Hi there,

You need to talk to someone who can help you and give you advice as soon as possible. Here are numbers of organisations you can reach out to to get help: https://bwisehealth.com/article/help-support-mental-health-substance-abuse



B-Wise User Kaymow 13 April 2020 21:57

I'm dating a guy he has a child n a girlfriend...Last time I saw him he tried to take my phone so that I can have sex with him now he calls endlessly and but I dont want to continue with this relationship and I'm scared he'll beat me for ending things with him...In the mean time I got a boyfriend who cares for me pls help me

B-Wise Expert Expert 15 April 2020 11:21

Hi there,

You are in a very difficult situation. I would advise you to be very honest with him and tell him that you don't want to continue because you have a caring boyfriend and you don't want to mess that up. Tell him to focus on his girlfriend and child and leave you alone because you are not interested.



B-Wise User Anonymous 12 April 2020 00:47

Ahi I'm gaining weight and I don't really eat that much I've been irritated alot with my life well actually I just had a baby two years shot and I went back too school last year and didn't really focus that we'll Iim 20 and I stress about finishing school but also I have too work that the reason why I stayed out of school too look after her but it's hard for me because I really feel uncomfortable in my parents house I feel like I should be doing something with my life at this point but I feel useless

B-Wise Expert Expert 14 April 2020 15:45

Hi Zennadeen,

I am so sorry to hear that you are having such a tough time. It sounds like you actually need to spend time talking to someone who can give you advice and listen to what you are going through. Here are some numbers of people you can reach out to.

Suicide crisis line: 0800 567 567 or sms 31393

Depression and Mental Health Helpline: call 0800 567 567 daily between 8am and 89pm for counseling and referral if you're suffering from depression, anxiety or mental health issues

The South African Depression and Anxiety Group (SADAG): 011- 262-6396

Mental health line: 011 783 1474




B-Wise User Anonymous 31 March 2020 11:50

Um really stressed about my school work, last year my school work was great especially home language but this year um struggling with mathematics.... So what do I do about this? Plz help

B-Wise Expert Expert 7 April 2020 13:02

Hi There Mpho, 


You can talk to your parents or guardians about attending extra classes, You can also get a tutor at our school to help you 



B-Wise User Brandontmj 29 March 2020 13:40

I'm stressing about something not knowing what but how do I get the answer for my stressing

B-Wise Expert Expert 30 March 2020 10:22

Hi Brandon, 


We would like to assist but you have not told us the problem You can talk to someone on any of these platforms

  • Stop Gender Violence helpline 24hrs: 0800 150 150
  • Gender-based violence call centre: 0800 428 428 (or *120*7867#)
  • Child Welfare South Africa: 0861 452 4110 (to report abuse or neglect)
  • Police emergency: 10111
  • Police (report a crime): 0860 010 111
  • National ambulance emergency: 01777 (or 112 on a cellphone)



Help and support from Childline: Find your province

  • Childline National Hotline: 08000 55555
  • Childline Eastern Cape: 041 484 1070
  • Childline Gauteng: 011 4841070
  • Childline KwaZulu Natal: 031 312 0904
  • Childline North West: 018 299 1940
  • Childline Western Cape: 021 461 1113
  • Free State: 051 401 2208



Help and support for family and relationships

If your family is affected by HIV, call the National Aids Helpline on 0800 012 322 or HIVSA on 011 494 1900


  • Family and Marriage Association of South Africa (FAMSA): 0119757106/7
  • FAMSA Bloemfontein: 051 525 2395
  • FAMSA Cape Town: 021 447 7951
  • FAMSA Dullstroom: 013 254 0158
  • FAMSA Durban: 031 202 8987
  • FAMSA East London: 043 743 8277
  • FAMSA Johannesburg: 011833 2057/8
  • FAMSA Kimberley: 053 872 2644
  • FAMSA Port Elizabeth: 041 585 9393
  • FAMSA Potchefstroom: 018 293 2272/2297
  • FAMSA Secunda 017 631 1593
  • FAMSA Soweto: 011 933 1301
  • FAMSA Tzaneen 015 307 4833



SA Social Security Agency (SASSA) Helpline: 0800 601 011



B-Wise User Samukelo e Sihle 26 March 2020 18:59

I am also losing weight and not to keen in my school work these fays "I work smart instead of hard in my school work " but the mere issue is that I don't know why is this happened to me cause even I can not identity my problem

B-Wise Expert Expert 27 March 2020 16:23

Hi There Samukelo, 


Its good that you are doing well in your schoolwork, try eating well and a healthy balanced diet, also exercise 



B-Wise User Temahlubi 20 March 2020 15:55

ð??¥I also have the same symptoms mentioned above, what do I do?

B-Wise Expert Expert 23 March 2020 13:39


If you are stressed, it is important that you speak to someone like your parents / caregiver / a trusted adult / healthcare worker or friend to help you cope.



B-Wise User Anonymous 14 March 2020 18:32

My daughter has all these signs...what can she do to lessen the stress? She has even lost weight and does not eat...she is showing no interest in her schoolwork...please help

B-Wise Expert Expert 23 March 2020 15:37

Hello There, 


You can talk to councillors on any of the toll free numbers https://bwisehealth.com/article/help-support-mental-health-substance-abuse



B-Wise User Anonymous 31 October 2019 19:00

All these signs happen to me.

B-Wise User Anonymous 14 October 2019 12:05

Hey I need help I think am dating this old guy,he has a wife and children I love him and when am with him I feel good about my self.. Yet I think am doing the wrong thing coz my peers want to date me but I feel nothing for them.. Not ready to let go of this man.. And he has no time for me

B-Wise Expert Expert 15 October 2019 11:50

Hi there, thank you for your question. Dating an older man with a wife and children can be difficult as they will be the first priority and he will have to take care of them first. It would be a good idea to talk to your partner about what you feel and what you expect from the relationship. 



B-Wise User Anonymous 16 September 2019 12:38

I am always stressed about my future job am a first year education part time student. I am always worried because I've been looking for part time jobs or something to do on the other side but nothing is happening. So am worried that even though I finish my studies I might not be employed.

B-Wise Expert Expert 17 September 2019 11:21

Hi there, thank you for your question. Its normal to be stressed about the future. You can check out the She conquers page as they post internships and bursaries daily. 



B-Wise User Anonymous 5 July 2019 16:09

define the term teenage pregnancy?

B-Wise Expert Expert 8 July 2019 08:30

Hi there, learn more here https://bwisehealth.com/article/teen-pregnancyit-changes-everything


B-Wise User Anonymous 2 June 2019 11:01

i am struggling with Mathematis at school and in my last term results its the only subject with the lower levels and i am confused about my mathematics studies??

B-Wise Expert Expert 3 June 2019 08:40

Hi there, thank you for your question. If you are struggling with a subject you need to talk to a teacher or you can go for extra lessons. 



B-Wise User Josty 17 March 2019 21:39

Good evening I have stress of I'm going to be a father soon and I can't afford to be a father because I'm not working so I end up having headache almost every day because of I am in need of a job.

B-Wise Expert Expert 18 March 2019 08:54

Hi, thank you for your question. It can be a very stressful situation especially if its causing you to have constant headaches. Its best that you visit your local clinic and talk to a doctor, you can also talk to a counselor at the local clinic who will be able to help you deal with the stress. 



B-Wise User Dizzle wizzle 15 September 2018 13:25

What must i do to pass well at school

B-Wise Expert Expert 27 September 2018 08:24

Hi there, thank you for your question. You can check out our  Know Your Mind section to help you pass well at school. 



B-Wise User Anonymous 20 May 2018 12:42

I don't care what people think of me and at school I am ficused

B-Wise Expert Expert 28 May 2018 10:01

Hi there, thank you for your comment. That's the spirit! It's important not to lose focus. Keep it up!



B-Wise User Anonymous 20 May 2018 12:41

My friends took me to some place and wanted to fight with me but instead I ran away coz I don't know how to fight

B-Wise Expert Expert 28 May 2018 17:55

Hi there. It sounds like you were in a very difficult situation, remember to always tell a trusted adult if your friends want to fight with you. 


B-Wise User Itumelengbenmonyanejr 13 April 2018 22:15

I like to listening to music every time when I have a lot of stress

B-Wise Expert Expert 20 April 2018 11:30

Hi, thank you for your response. Music is very helpful when you have stress.



B-Wise User Itumelengbenmonyanejr 13 April 2018 22:14

I like to listening to music every time when I have a lot of stress

B-Wise Expert Expert 20 April 2018 11:31

Hi, thank you for your feedback. Music can be very helpful when you have a lot of stress



B-Wise User masonmasemola 13 April 2018 21:55

Feeling of havin sex everytime

B-Wise Expert Expert 20 April 2018 11:33

Hi, thank you for your feedback. Wanting to have sex every time at this age is normal. Remember to use a condom every time you have sex to prevent HIV, STIs and unplanned pregnancies.

Stay Safe !!



B-Wise User letlotlo 5 July 2017 23:24

I used to think about my bae lije what he doing?who he is with?

B-Wise Expert Expert 20 April 2018 11:53

Hi there, thank you for your feedback. We are glad you learnt something new from reading the article



B-Wise User TUMIE 15 February 2017 18:36

I LIKE POSITIVE STRESS. IT HELPS ME NOT TO SLEEP, IT MAKES ME DO MORE. IT MAKES ME SEE MANY THINGS I NEED TO ACCOMPLISH AND THE WAY TIME IS ALWAYS AGAINST ME

B-Wise Expert Expert 20 April 2018 13:01

Hi Tumie, that'st true positive stress can help you to do more but remember it is important for your body to get enough rest as well.